Is it the chill air around, am not sure. Am in one of those awful phases. Seems to have chilled me to the bone. Feel cold. Remain cold. Everything appears to be frozen. The embers seem to have died down, and left with a cold metallic chillness. Lifeless. This is one part, the other part simmering, and what erupts seem to flow unabated. And even as it flows turns cold. So it is like, layers of cold, resulting in a state of frozen suspension. I presume its just hibernation, and the spirit, deep inside is safe and ticking. Wouldn't like to be stifled by this heavy silence, that seems to have descended as a cloak, draping itself all over me.
Yes, we re on our own, get this straight and get it right. No bonds be it bound by holy vows, or by blood, or by baring of souls are forever. Tighter the bonds, greater the pain, when it breaks. So you don't tighten your bonds? And ofcourse they choose to bind themselves tighter, and unbind too.
Had this strong urge to walk away into the distant horizon, and this blessed place leaves me with no such option. Yearned for a silent rest in the peaceful precincts of a temple, to calm my struggling spirits, even if answers don't always emerge.
When you think you have grown, seen it all, turned mature, and you have almost or atleast most of the answers, there is a blow, that crumbles your resolute props, just like that. The inner strength or the erected barricades seem to fall apart meekly, unceremoniously. It is for real, when it hits you, the fact that, you are left with pieces of what you are, and you are to make something of the mess, yet again.
